We are thrilled to introduce to you Amanda Sharp Fillweber of Sharp Designs Inc.
Amanda is a health and wellness coach since 2007, single mom of two, free lance graphic artist & photographer, dream creator and well known blogger of gut wrenching personally responsible truth at http://journeytoourlegacy.wordpress.com. She lives in Colorado Springs, Colorado.
You can check out her amazing photos here: Photography & Graphic Design: http://web.mac.com/sharpdesignsinc
Alright, man this blog has been bugging me as my head has been jammed up in a dark place. I do want freedom, I do want release from my flesh, and I do want peace. AND I can’t have any of that without God. God only grants those things when we are in his lap. Crawling out is my choice, and what I create out of his lap is questionable.
Am I who I want to be? Not even close. I want to be like Jesus and we are all clear I’m not. I want to perfect my response with every situation thrown at me. I want to be kind, loving and un-expecting. Why am I still searching for love as if HE is NOT enough? I want to let you in, I want to not be affected by peoples actions. I want to turn the other cheek, I want to give grace, and I don’t want to be used or be a place people wipe the fecal matter off their shoes. How do I get there?
I don’t. I am human and so are YOU. My understanding is that we aren’t Jesus, and it is specifically set up that way so that we will NEED him. He wants to be asked for his help as he is a gentleman. I actually don’t regret anything that has occurred in my life because it has been a refiners fire. In that fire, much has risen to the top. My response is the only thing I can take as my true character. I have a choice to sit in findings of that or have HIM scrape off the refuse and move on. I have to be content with, that I am not perfect, and when I am squeezed hard enough, something crazy is going to seep out of my pores. That is the grace room I believe. The flip side of this is that I have immense character created from my fires. I am more loving, kind and compassionate than i use to be. I have changed in so many areas and I am teachable.
I am NOT to be perfect, I am to strive for holiness, as I am who I am by the grace of God.
Do be careful though, if you smell smoke and see fire, step back as you will be the receiver of devastation as a crab grasps at the leg above him to get out of the sweltering pot. If you set the fire under me then please stop stirring the pot, that is just cruel. God is the one that changes me. We are all in our own pots and that is where grace comes in when our worlds collide. I know every person has been in my life for a reason, some to deeply love me and some to create a fire that helps me recognize my impurities. We burn each other and God is the salve when we do. Please do NOT hear that I am okay with us mistreating each other, I am open to forgiveness and moving on. So instead of going into blame and “I’m such an awful person, look what I create” go into “Lord help me, this is not great what I create and I want to be more like you.”
“Character is both developed and revealed by tests, and all of life is a test. You are always being tested. God constantly watches your response to people, problems, success, conflict, illness, disappointment, and even the weather! We don’t know all the tests God will give you, but we can predict some of them, based on the Bible. You will be tested by major changes, delayed promises, impossible problems, unanswered prayers, undeserved criticism, and even senseless tragedies. In my own life I have noticed that God tests my faith through problems, tests my hope by how I handle possessions, and tests my love through people.” –The purpose driven life
I can tell you with the fires in Colorado Springs this week, demolishing our states beauty and many many houses, we are seeing what character we have. We are being tested to see what we will do in absolute devastation. It is perceived as devastation because now we are uncomfortable in all areas, some out on the streets. A horrific example that life can change in an instant and an immediate realization of the foundation we are standing on? I wouldn’t be alive if mine wasn’t in Christ. My previous foundation burnt to the ground and I was standing there naked and embarrassed with what I created. Now, I stand with HIM and WE walk through life together, me striving for more of his qualities and him giving me grace when I royally fail (in my eyes, not his).
“Every day is an important day, and every second is a growth opportunity to deepen your character, to demonstrate love, or to depend on God. Some tests seem overwhelming, while others you don’t even notice. But all of them have eternal implications. The good news is God wants you to pass the tests of life, so he never allows the tests you face to be greater than the grace he give you to handle them. The Bible says God keeps his promise, and he will not allow you to be tested beyond your power to remain firm; at the time you are put to the test, he will give you the strength to endure it, and so provide you with a way out. The most important test is how do you act when you can’t feel Gods presence in your life. What do you do when your character is being tested as God draws back?” –The purpose driven life
As I have been in thought around this blog, my son, who has a close connection to the spirit brought me this note. I definitely take this love note from my son and it warms my heart and I know in the back of my head he is a messenger from God.
That is the TRUTH and I will leave you with that.
As my mom has always said to me “You are doing great, keep going.” Also words I receive from God.”
You are doing great, keep Going, -Amanda